Just A Little Patience

Some of the best advice I was given (but didn’t follow) was to wait five years before making any big decisions.  After the Big Man died, there were things that had to be done to my home to make it functional for me.  I didn’t have the luxury of waiting five years to decide what to do.  Although I didn’t follow it, that advice is most definitely sound.

Less than two years after he passed, I made the decision to retire.  I was battling health issues and home repairs on top of a mountain of office politics capped with a failing relationship.  As they say, desperate people do desperate things. I wanted out!  I wanted relief from the pressure and the fear.  I thought I had figured it all out and this was going to fix EVERYTHING!

I just knew I could do this.  Money might be a little tight, but I could always get a part-time job to fill the gap. To say my financial calculations were off would be a gross understatement.  So, one pandemic, one back surgery, and one recession later, I am operating on a third of the income with piss-poor interest rates on all of my accounts and a pocket full of medical bills.

Shows you what I know.

I’ll be the first to tell you that I LOVE being retired.  I love not being on someone else’s schedule.  I love not being in traffic, not having people bitch at me over things I can’t control, and not being subjected to the political bullshit.  I love being in my pajamas all day!  However, retiring might not have been the most rational decision I’ve ever made.

Patience has never been one of my virtues and having just a little would have served me well when making this decision.  Toughing it out just one more year would have been a huge help financially.  It just so happens, the “problem” in the office retired shortly after I did! Things would have changed had I simply waited.  I knew better.  The only thing constant in that place was change!  But I was so broken.  You suffer the consequences when you channel Veruca Salt and WANT IT NOW.  So take a deep breath and listen to Guns N Roses (yeah another ear worm!).

Beware of instant gratification when you’re grieving.

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